Every year, it has been our "tradition" to buy gifts for family members. We go to the "tiangge's" to look for gifts to give away. I was always tasked and given the responsibility to make a list, choose the items and buy the gifts for the very special people in our lives.
This year, I'm just not in the mood to do the task. It's almost December and I have not bought one single christmas gift. I guess I'm just not up for it. I would like to apologize to all these special people but, I would have to pass up on this, and hopefully just this year.I used to enjoy shopping for gifts. Sadly, it's not one of the things i enjoy doing anymore. It's just not right doing it by myself this time. I have been thinking about it for days, but i just can't do it. I don't want to. Because it will just bring back memories. Good memories, in fact, but these good memories will surely make me sad. Honestly, I am not even planning to celebrate christmas this year. I have this "what is there to celebrate?" feeling. But then, i have kids and christmas is truly for kids. And I know it will be unfair if I insist on not celebrating christmas. I owe them my strength, they keep me going, and they are the source of my happiness. And these are enough reasons for me to feel the christmas spirit.
